Beyond the Veil; Witnessing Life
I have so missed writing this blog.
So many things have happened since I last wrote…more health issues with family – my father, mother and father in law; graduations; and most of all bearing witness to the purest sense of light throughout my own inner struggles.
One thing that I keep in my spiritual bag of tricks is the ability to pull negative energy from others. I’ve done this since I was a young child and further down the road as I learned energy healing techniques of Reiki, Zenith and Shamanism, the ability and intensity became stronger. It is in those moments of energy sessions that I release to Spirit and allow Creator God to work through me. I am not the one creating the energy. I am merely the vessel by which it travels.
I’ve done sessions remotely for people around the world. I’ve assisted in person inside hospitals, hospices, conference rooms, at car accidents and even the occasional outdoor Vision Quest. This is something I was born to do and I truly feel it to be a large part of my life’s purpose and mission. Separating my personal feelings surrounding these situations has become a much needed tool in order for me to focus on assisting the person I am helping. I suppose you could call this a form of channeling. If you were to look at the brain like a computer, I have learned to bypass the emotional area and connect fully and completely to my soul. This doesn’t stop me from my human experience of feeling. However, it does allow me to concentrate all of my intention on letting the energy from home flow through.
This all worked well until Dad became ill. Silly human that I am, I have not quite mastered the dissociation of emotion and energy work when it comes to my father. I try my best not to analyze this, because I’ve worked with many people, even family, and other clients I have deeply cared for. I have assisted with the passing and transition of several dear souls through the deathing work that I do, and even while working with loved ones I have held it together and been able to see through the spiritual perspective and not allow my emotions of grief and sadness to be in the forefront.
Working with my father is unfamiliar territory for me. It honestly pains me to the core to feel the physical trauma within him. I guess I still see him with the eyes of the little girl inside me, the one that sees Daddy as stronger than Super Man, smarter than any scientist and with a heart larger than the Grand Canyon.
The most challenging part so far for me on this journey with Dad has been the ability to see family and loved ones from the other side gathered around him. I’ve seen this scenario time and time again with clients in pain and especially with those getting ready to pass. It usually brings great comfort to witness such love and support. When I first saw my father’s brothers and sisters gathered around him at the hospital, my heart went out the door and fear stepped in, big time. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye. And even though, through my spiritual experience, I knew that the love of his family was helping him to make whatever decisions would come next, my emotional heart struggled to even be in the same room. I fought long and hard to try to tune their presence out, not to see or sense these wonderful souls who circled the wagons of support around my father. It never worked. It was like trying not to see while having my eyes open.
Dad would begin to sing and hum in his sleep during hist stay in the hospital. I would see a woman around him, stroking his head, singing along with him and whispering in his ear. She seemed to give him so much comfort. I could watch the muscles in his body release and relax when she would come into the room, holding his hand, all the while having this huge smile on her face. The woman had this amazing sense of peace and calm and grace about her. Her presence around him was greater than the rest. She would often times appear when Dad was getting agitated and when he was restless. Her energy would slow his rapid breathing down and his blood pressure would come back to a normal rate. I began to really enjoy watching her comfort Dad and seeing the physical results take place.
One day, while watching her interact with him while he was drifting off to sleep, I began to cry. The thought of what may be ahead scared the utter hell out of me. For the first time, this woman locked eyes with me. She sat down next to me and began to stroke my hair. She felt so loving, so safe. She told me that the only thing stronger than fear was love. She beckoned to me to choose to see love through all this and to know that Dad would be fine, whether he chose to stay within the physical or go home to be with God. I didn’t want her to leave. I wanted to cling to her like a life raft. The woman was beautiful and had an inner strength that seemed so familiar to me. When she was no longer present beside me, I kicked myself for not asking her her name.
Imagine my shock, when a short time later, I received this photo from my cousin. This is a picture of my grandmother, Mabel, when she was 21 years old and a school teacher.
I had never seen photos of my Dad’s mother, other than one when she was about four years old. She passed before I was born so I never had the luxury of getting to know her. Apparently that has changed.
When I gazed at this photo I knew this was the woman who was around my father, the one that eased him and helped him calm down. She appeared to me just as she looks in this photo. I was thrown for a complete loop to say the least.
Everything is in Divine Time. My Grandmother gave me emotional support and advice when I needed it most. She supported her son during his trauma. The photo came to me at the exact right time. There are no coincidences.
My soul, once again feels renewed. I know that love truly is stronger than fear, no matter which side of the veil you call home.
Blessings to all,