The Dark Side of Living in the Light

dark n light

The Dark Side of Living in the Light

Catchy title, right?  Not wishing to be dramatic here.  Just telling it like it is.

For some people, living in “the light” means being of a higher vibration and seeing that vibration in all of existence.  That is beautiful, amazing and wonderful.  It is possible to find your Zen and look at life from the higher perspective and realize that no matter what happens in the lifetime, you are a soul with a continuous stream of existence.

For other people, they find their spirituality within the light by adapting belief systems and practices that allow them to feel closer to their higher power.  This too, is an incredible way of life.

And still others take on roles as light workers, healers, ministers and such to help people open up to their light, to empower them to embrace their spirit and their strength.  Many of these Spiritual teachers and leaders teach that we are of a vibration now where darkness no longer exists, while others will pound the reality of evil into the forefront of their teachings to elicit fear.

So where is reality in all this?

I believe we create our own reality through our perspective.  If you believe that we are living in a higher dimension right now where no dark energies can be present, then that is your reality.  If you believe you have to adhere to certain rules and rituals because the devil waits for you around each corner, then that is your truth.

I never really believed in curses or spells.  Sure, I liked to play witch when I was a little girl and was known to play with candles when I wasn’t supposed to.  I was drawn to ancient Egyptian texts at a young age and marveled at their rites and incantations used in ceremony.  I thought it magical.  I respected their devotion to their faith.  But that, honestly, was about it.

Then began my studies in Native American Shamanism.  I was part of ceremonial practices and could feel Spirit and energy all around me.  It wasn’t a spell.  I wasn’t directing negativity to anyone.  It was beautiful, engaging, entrancing and LIGHT!  The connection made my heart sing.

As I dug deeper into my spiritual learning, I still held a disregard for curses, believing that only those in a state of fear and adhering to a particular belief system could be affected by such things.  I gave this practice no power whatsoever.  Even when my teachers would explain about psychic warfare and how to combat it, I would go to my happy place in my mind.  Those things had nothing to do with me.  They were for other people, not as “light” as me of course, to deal with in their reality.

And then I got my first attachment.  It hit me hard.  I was depleted, mentally, physically, emotionally and definitely spiritually.  I thought I was losing my mind.  I couldn’t concentrate, didn’t want to move and definitely felt like leaving this life would be the best choice I could make.  Thankfully, I turned to a trusted teacher and Shaman for help.  I thought it was something purely physical or perhaps I pulled something in from a client.

As I spoke to my Elder, he connected with my energy.  I could see him going into trance and taking inventory of my field.  Within moments he told me each physical symptom I was having, the negative thoughts I’d been experiencing as well as visions of a man I’d been working with.  He went on further to explain to me that this man had placed a negative entity into my energy field to weaken me and cause me harm.

I was dumbfounded.  Why would anyone want to do that?  I was very Pollyannaish about being of the light.  I thought as long as I did my light work I got a free pass on negativity.

Ummmm….NO!  Even as I write that statement I cringe.  And I laugh.

My wonderful teacher explained to me the importance of boundaries – physical, emotional and energetic.  He also enforced and reiterated the tools I had been taught but not practicing myself in regards to clearing and dealing with negative energies directed to cause and inflict harm.

My mind and heart went into fear.  Was I so weak that I allowed this person to harm me?  What would happen next time?  Why didn’t my guides let me know?  How can I be intuitive and not know this?

I saw the eyes of my teacher begin to sparkle and a smile paint across his compassionate face.  “What did you learn?”  He asked.  “What gifts were you given?  And Honey, if you expect your guides to give you ALL the answers you are barking up the wrong tree.  If they gave you all the answers why would you be here?  You would stay on the other side.”

I sat with that.  Long and hard I sat with that.  I began to realize that life is a learning curve.  Each experience gifts us an opportunity to discover something new.

Doing this work for going on 20 years now, I’ve witnessed and experienced more than my share of light and dark.  I believe we can’t have one without the other – not on this Earth plane.  We come here to experience both and to learn from each.  And then we have a choice.  Which will we allow to be the driving force in our life, good or evil?

Yes, there are curses, spells, negative entities, demons, dark dimensional beings, psychic attacks and other creepy crawlies in existence.  But that doesn’t mean we have to bury our heads in the sand or hide under the covers.  Knowledge, as they say, is power.  There are tools to deter each of these scenarios and just because something is out there doesn’t mean you will experience it.

Every bad thing that happens in your life isn’t because of a curse or some sorcerer conjuring black magic.  Take responsibility for your life, meaning – your BODY, your MIND and your ENERGY. When all are in good working order with proper boundaries in place, no darkness can come through.


The Duality of the Path of a Healer ~


The Duality of the Path of a Healer

There are many views of the role of, “Healer.”  Some take this as being a farce in itself, while others revere the role and place said healer upon a pedestal.   I suppose what is most important is how a healer defines their own role upon the planet and within society.

I took on this role many moons ago when I was a small child and began to sense energy and spirits.  I did this on a conscious and subconscious level, though I did not publicly come forward as claiming myself as a healer till much later in life when I began working through massage school.  Massage school opened a whole new understanding for me of what I’d been experiencing my whole life as I stepped into the remembrance of energy work, Reiki and Native American Medicine.

To be called a Healer, to me, is to of service to Spirit.  It is to bring forward information and light that the person you are assisting most likely will not be able to perceive on their own.  Free will is ALWAYS respected and bottom line is, a person is ready to let go of the pain or they are not.  I would never, ever step forward and claim that I could heal anyone.  My intention is very far from that.  I work and teach and empower those I work with to heal themselves, for this is the first level where healing begins, isn’t it?  I like to use the analogy of having a broken arm.  If I break my arm and go to a doctor to have it set and casted it should heal, right?  Most likely it will, IF YOU BELIEVE IT TO BE SO.  If you are ready to heal it will happen.  If you need to hold onto the experience for further learning, then it will not heal.

I sit back and watch the judgment of those who are called healers – Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, just to name some of the more famous ones that have come up recently within the last few years.  I watch as people criticize them for experiencing disease within their physical selves.  How could one who claims to be a healer need healing themselves?  How, if a teacher and healer is doing “their work” could they become ill?  And here is where the duality of the role of healer comes through.

Healers are human.  I repeat: Healers are human!!  They have and walk a human experience just like everyone else on the planet does.  They have families, bills, stresses, do laundry and take care of a million other tasks, just like other people.  It is a fine balance to maintain balance as human/healer.  You must allow yourself the feelings and experiences that this planet offers – the hurt, the joy, the stress, the limitations, the abundance, etc for with each emotion and mastery, you learn – just like everyone else.  However, a healer, because of their life of service, will place the knowledge gained from the lesson in their tool kit and take out the wisdom to share when need be, to assist another human being headed along the same path.

Many healers are transparent.  They share their highs and lows openly with the world.  Their vulnerability becomes their strength.  I see this so clearly in people like Louise Hay and Wayne Dyer.  And lets be honest.  If you wanted to cure yourself from a disease like cancer, who’s input would you want on the subject?  Someone who has dealt with it?  OR someone who has read about possible cures?

I can’t tell you the anger that set in with me when my dear friend and brother, Michael Bradley, contracted cancer.  I received so many emails from people across the world asking me how someone so powerful and so of the light could allow such a thing to happen to him.  I became defensive and wanted to lash out at anyone who would judge someone, especially my dear brother, so harshly.  But as I sat with the emails, and I allowed my heart to open, I could see that these people were only acting on the knowledge they had, they were only expressing their own experience.  It gave me a wonderful opportunity to turn my anger into unconditional love, as my dear brother so lovingly has taught me, as I expressed to them the duality of being a healer and human being.  The pain and struggle Michael experienced, because he was open about it, promoted healing on great levels to so many of us.  In my heart, as I reflect on his process, I see he was not only clearing his own “stuff” but he was also clearing pain for so many others who never had a voice to do so.  He cleared for those who came back from a war they never believed in.  He cleared for those who were told they were nothing and believed it.  He brought fellow healers together and created connection that spanned an entire planet…literally.

How on Earth could this experience be viewed as a weakness?  Not in my book, I’ll tell you!

Being a “healer” is a rewarding life – you see the light bulb turn on when people understand.  It is not because you caused it.  It is because you took the time to allow Spirit to move through you and speak – whether that is through your voice, your written words, the energy you channel through your hands, or the love you send through your heart.  In that essence, we are all healers, aren’t we?

Healing thoughts and blessings to you all,